My Bucket List

I'm an organized person who highly enjoys lists. So, naturally, I cram all my life goals and aspirations into a neatly compacted list that I can reference whenever I want. 

Hey, what can I say, I want the most out of life. 

Without further adieu, here are the many things I desire to do before my heart stops beating: (that sounds a little grim, let me try again)

Without further adieu, here are the many things I want to accomplish during the beautiful state of consciousness that is "life": 

1. Throw Tomatoes At La Tomatina 

What? La Tomatina is a festival in Spain where thousands of tomatoes are whopped around everywhere and at everyone for a long, fun hour of bright red joy!

Why? It is very rare that one finds a moment of complete human unison where everyone lets go of their inhibitions and flings around some vegetables just for the hell of it. I want to experience this awesome human odyssey. It's a free for all food fight that 

2. Eat at One of the World's Best Restaurants 

What? The dapper looking man above is Rene Redzepi, the head chef of Copenhagen's Noma Restaurant, voted multiple times as the world's best restaurant. It's a wonderland of Scandinavian cuisine. 

Why? Good food makes me happy. And tasting the best of the best would be a legendary experience. Nothing's more classy than saying you stopped by Denmark for some of the world's best kåldolmar!

3. Set Foot on all 7 Continents 

What? Antartica/The Arctic, Europe, Asia, Africa, Oceania, South America, and North America. From icebergs to deserts, from mountains to volcanoes and so much more! 

Why? Our world is a huge, and amazing place. I am such a small part of it. I am confined to a minuscule little slice of the earth. The mystery of the unknown is alluring, and I am determined to make the most of my worldly existence. 

4. Go horseback riding in Swan Valley, Montana

What? Unadultered, beautiful countryside that begs to be trotted about by a horse and rider, a true feast for the eyes

Why? This type of landscape is unfamiliar to me, due to where I live (in a city). It would be so peaceful and gorgeous to look at snow-capped mountains and magnificent lakes. 

5. Hold an Event in the Sky 

What? Nope, your eyes are not deceiving you. It really is possible to hold an event (of whatever you choose) suspended in mid-air. eventsinthesky.com

Why? Doing things that scare you are great for your health. It would certainly terrify and delight me to do such ordinary things in such an extraordinary location. That's right mom and dad, get your seatbelts on, and meet me in the air for my graduation dinner! 

6. Vacation in Igloo Village 

What? Just what the title says, a village of frickin igloos! How cozy/awesome? This delightfully anachronistic place is in Kakslauttanen, Finland. But don't worry, we aren't going back to the age of the caveman. They're heated (eeeee:D) with beds, restrooms, and kitchens. 

Why? I'm a sucker for cozy cabin-in-the-woods type vacations. This would be eons better than a stuffy hotel and I would love to go to Finland, just...because! It's Finland, guys!! 

7. Cross a Country On a Bicycle 

What? Hop on a bike, gear up, and cycle your way across an entire country (one with manageable terrain and a small size, preferably. That means no to Alaska, sorry people.) 

Why? Just for the pure sense of accomplishment you would feel would be worth the journey. Also, it would be very low-cost, you'll get your legs toned up, and the sights would be incredible! I would pick somewhere in the UK, like England or Scotland. Hello Stonehedge!!! 

8. Learn to Speak Another Language Fluently 

What? I would probably go for Spanish, as it's what I'm learning at the moment.

Why? I'm a social person, and linguistics interest me, as well as travel, so what better way to tap into this than learn another language?! Not only that, but it would open a whole slew of doors to me, employment-wise, travel-wise....

9. Bathe in the Ganges Rivers During the Purna Kumbh Mela 

What? Purna Kumbh Mela is a 45-day holy pilgrimage that takes place every 12 years. The festivities take place in different cities depending on the position of the moon, or something like that. Basically, you go bathe in the holy water among locals! 

Why? I wonder what the feeling of being cleansed by "pure" and "holy" water would feel like? I would consider myself agnostic, so this would be an eye-opening experience and would build on my knowledge. 

10. Drive the Great Ocean Road 

What? This winding, breathtaking road is located in Australia and is home to a walking trail with exotic wildlife, and other wonders. 

Why? Well, firstly, the fact that it was constructed by soldiers as a gargantuan memorial to the casualties of World War 1 appeals to the history buff in me. Secondly, taking those smooth turns in a sweet Ferrari Enzo (let's assume I'm a millionaire) while casually glancing at the azure, rippling tide of the Indian (or maybe it's Pacific? Not sure, terrible at geography) ocean would be luxurious to say the least. 

11. Drink Beer at Oktoberfest 

What? A 16 day beer-laden festival with thousands upon thousands of drunk partying Germans and hearty food to fill your stomach with! 

Why? I'll admit I have a sweet spot for some Reiberdatschi and Marzenbier, but how much fun would a huge drunken festival of foreigners be?! Maybe dangerous, but who cares when you're drunk with a stomach full of Wurstl?! 

12. Float Around the Dead Sea 

What? It's a salt lake that borders Jordan in Israel. It's known as a mecca for health research and treatment. 

Why? The scenery is gorgeous, I would finally be able to float in water (a long time challenge for me hehehe), and who knows? Maybe some of my ailments could be cured. 

12. Watch the Sunset from Oia, Santorini, Greece

What? Do I even need to explain?! Look at that ^^ It's beautiful beyond words!! A gem of nature. 

Why? See above. My eyes would die of happiness! 

I'll leave it at that. I have many more bucket list items, but I wouldn't want to bore you! 

Life is fleeting, so do what you want when you can! 

What are some of your bucket list items? 

-Mesonoxxian xxoo

The Fine Art of Not Giving a Fuck: Apathy

Fact: all humanistic beings with no range-of-moment consciousness have, at one moment or another, GAVE A DAMN what another humanistic being thought of them. The time we spend pondering the mental perceptions other people have of us is irrevocable. There's no chance in hell you can take back the time you lost stupidly flouncing around in your head with a quizzical expression on your face. 

That's right. Giving a damn is a waste of time. 

"Why am I out here on the streets in a freaky mouse costume? Cuz I couldn't care less"

But we are all guilty of it. We worry if someone likes us, we worry if we look good, we worry about appearing as something we aren't. Would you like to know why this is all such bullshit? Well, I'm pleased as peas to tell you.

1. Judgement from other people is constantly happening and can't be stopped. Therefore, by worrying about it, you're living up to Einstein's definition of insanity: doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results.

2. Life's short, have fun! When you're on your deathbed, will you seriously be lamenting about how you "SHOULDN'T HAVE POSTED THAT UGLY PICTURE ON FACEBOOK BECAUSE EVERYONE THINKS I'M UGLY NOW" ? Nah. 

3. It's so much fucking easier to not care. More energy than you'd think is spent on caring. 

How do I stop giving a fuck?

I realize such a startling revelation has probably left you gasping for air and stumbling around in confusion. But don't worry, I GOTCHU! How? Well, my intelligent little reader, there isn't any other way than to clear out all the unimportant bullshit going on in your brain about how vital your reputation is and PUT THAT GODDAMN MESSENGER BAG ON (or whatever crazy shit you're into) WITHOUT FEAR OF EMBARRASSMENT.

Now, there are boundaries with such an attitude. There are certain people whose opinions matter. Don't go flashing your employer simply because you "don't care." Too far. 

This last bit is important, kiddies, so put your listening hat on. To all you potential wrong-doers out there, I am not saying you should stop caring if people live or die, stop caring about following the law, stop caring about your well-being, stop caring about preserving others safety, etc. Okay? 

If you'd like to be further educated on this subject, I would recommend taking a gander to this website and enjoying the riches of enlightenment: 

http://inoveryourhead.net/the-complete-guide-to-not-giving-a-fuck/

Good luck all my fellow apathetties!! (invented word...it will catch on) 

 

-Mesonoxxian

 

Dark Luscious Hair

I have discovered the perfect way to get silky, dark, shiny hair. The hair of a goddess. And I am eager to share it with you!! 

1. The first thing I do is make my hair mask. Combine, in a bowl, 2 egg yolks and one teaspoon of olive oil. Mix it up, etc. Then put it all over your hair. This is a messy process but it works!!! Don't use sparingly. Slather it all over your lovely locks! (or soon to be lovely if you have flyaway-ridden, dull hair like me.) Leave it on for 10 minutes. 

2. Whilst you let the phosvitins of the egg yolk and Olea europaea fat work wonders for the pesky filamentous bio-material that sprouts outta' yo scalp, make up the black tea rinse. Get a big bowl of hot water...well, not big...medium sized should suffice. Depends on what quantity of hair you've got. Anyways, once you have your hot water, plunk 2 or 3 black tea bags (chamomile if you're a blondie) into the water and let it sit there for 2 minutes. After 2 minutes, give it a stir, and put it in a jar of some kind. We will be using this later!!!

3. Once your egg/olive oil mask has been in for 10 minutes, go shampoo it out. If you'd like to avoid commercial shampoos, you can use a combination of 1 egg and 1 cup skim milk, or some baking soda and water combined. I usually shampoo a couple times to get it all out. Once you've done that, pour the black tea all over your hair and leave it in for 15 minutes. After that, rinse it out and your hair will be shiny and gorgeous when dry!! 

You're welcome. 

-Mesonoxxian

Profanity

This program is rated 18A for mature language and themes. Parental Discretion is advised.

^^We've all had our share of jitters at hearing that low, monotone male voice warn us about the sinful shit we are about to be viewing. It's the worst if your parents are in the room. You pray there's not a sex scene so you won't have to succumb to death for no other reason than the 30 awkward minutes you have to endure with your creators. 

Other than running the risk of seeing - gasp - human body parts, and maybe some kind of violence, it's the words that make our television providers caution us beforehand. Swear words are what I am referring to. Maybe you call them "cusses" or "curses." Foul words. You get the picture. They are a combination of totally innocent letters into a word that our society deems "profane." 

The Latin origins of the word "profane" is actually quite fascinating. It means "in front of", "outside the church." To sum it up for you, anything not belonging to the church. Apparently when we utter certain words, we desecrate all that is holy. 

To keep on with the religious theme here, there are indeed curses in the bible. 

THE BIBLE?! NO NO NO. MY LORD JESUS WOULD NEVER ALLOW SUCH AN ABOMINATION!!! 

Think again, child of God. Open your holy book to 2 Kings 18:27 where Rabshakeh takes a spicy little swing at whoever he's chatting up, referring to men who "eat dung and drink their own piss." 

What I think is mind-blowing is how much power these words have! And they're just words. The word SHIT is every bit as much a word as SHOE. 

Take off all the negative connotations and they're nothing but constructions of letters. Yet we are raised not to say them. We are raised to believe that these words are bad and terrible. People get in trouble for saying them. People are suspended from school or fired from work. 

I can comprehend why people aren't feeling hunky-dory about them. They are usually used in anger, disrespect, or to insult someone. However, anger is just as much an emotion as happiness. 

So, with all that said, why, my friend, can I yell HUZZAH but not FUCK NOOO! among the general public without getting glares of hatred pointed my way? They are both expressions of emotions. The difference? One is taboo, one is not. 

A thought to ponder. 

hehehehehehehehehehe